Movie on 1-3-23 at 4.02 pm

In Spring 1972, my ex-husband phoned me from Los Angeles. His raspy, nasal voice crackled over the phone.

‘I’m on my way to Boulder Colorado with the girls. I’ve taken a job at the university there. You are a deserting wife and an abandoning mother  and you’ll never see your children again!’

I put the phone down and sat in shock for what seemed like hours. Last time we had communicated about this, he was to bring them down to Sydney to stay with me for two weeks in the school holidays, and we would talk with our lawyers about shared custody arrangements. He had warned me a few weeks before that he was considering taking a job in the US, but had agreed to discuss custody issues further with me. So … thus it was. The end of my life, and the beginning of a new, strange, in-between life where I had no place and no safety.

The story of that fatal day, what led up to it, and how I survived and turned the loss into a dark gift, has been unfolding for the rest of my life, and I have been writing it for over twenty years. Publication date is 10 November. Before that, copies can be pre-ordered; see links below.

Some comments from readers:

… an exercise in survival and determination in the face of extraordinary loss, leading to a calm and balanced state of forgiveness whereby she can let go of the cruelty of her past with a compassion that is awesome in its humility.

A Practice of Loss is a story to re-read and treasure, one of redemption and repair, the best antidote to unbearable pain, and grief. As well, it acts as both a reminder of and a softener to the rage that rises whenever we hear of such patriarchal cruelty towards women and children.

Elisabeth Hanscombe, author of The Art of Disappearing

It was moving, uplifting at times. I felt as though I was experiencing the events with you, I appreciated how you conveyed complex characters so we could question our own assumptions and I just found myself absorbed in the world of the memoir.

Jordyn Presley, writer

On the border between memoir and fiction, this book draws the reader in immediately, into the painful situation of the narrator, Anna. An Australian woman unhappily married to a remote and domineering man, Anna has fallen in love with a gentle neighbour in their English village. Her life is most deeply anchored in her love for her three small daughters, for whom she has full caring responsibility. From this premise unspools a story of searching, of manipulation and treachery, and of wrenching loss. I found it almost too painful to read, at times. But the bond with her daughters endures, and her own growth in wisdom, and resilience, and ability to forgive, proves uplifting.

A sequel to the equally brilliant This Place You Know.

—Dr Mary Besemeres, author and researcher, ANU

Christina’s beautiful book is a devastating journey through loss, betrayal and grief to acceptance and forgiveness. It captivated me and I read it in one day. Beautifully written, it catches at the reader with hooks of recognition. I so admired Christina’s self-awareness and searing honesty.

Olivia Wroth, Principal at Superscript Writing and Editing.

I am into chapter 5 of your book. What a saga it’s turning out to be! It’s a thrilling roller coaster!

—Liz Charuk.

I find it fantastic that you managed to reconnect. I thought this was amazing, after such a terrible destructive situation, how that is possible to rebuild relationships after that. I think it is something that is so hopeful, positive and could be inspiring to lots of people. That there is hope after loss.

—Maud Cassignau,  practising urban designer, architect, critic, researcher and educator.

God what a story !!! I found it quite heartbreaking and admired the way you manage to put your life together again. It  etched itself in quite a different way from the first book which I would like to reread now.- both painful stories of loss and  betrayal by men.

—Janet Wilson, Professor Emerita of English and Postcolonial Studies

It’s hard to express how wonderful I found it! Your beautiful open heart and mind were very present in it for me, and the curiosity you have bought to your experiences and your inner world is inspiring to me … I felt a real sense of comradery and solidarity and can’t wait to read what you write next.

— Samantha O’Connor

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